Here's British reality star Chantelle Houghton in France today. Honestly, I've never heard of this woman before, but believe it or not, I'm familiar with bikinis. No, really, I wouldn't lie to you. Unless we were married then it'd be an almost daily occurrence.
WIFE: Honey, what are you doing?
ME: Eating a sandwich.
WIFE: But you're standing in the garage naked with a chainsaw.
ME: .... We ran out of mustard.
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